Elsie Schrotthaufen's Book of Wonders

Elsie Schrotthaufen's Book of Wonders

bookofwonders.tumblr.com
Hello! A veritable scrapheap of wonders, near wonders, non wonders, and other wonderfulness. Hello!    
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“You’ll have to speak up. I seem to have lacquered my hair to my... “You’ll have to speak up. I seem to have lacquered my hair to my... DMCA
Is it just me, or does the top of that Lamborghini look like a... Is it just me, or does the top of that Lamborghini look like a... DMCA
Because calling it a Fun Sweatshop made all the vice presidents... Because calling it a Fun Sweatshop made all the vice presidents... DMCA
Okay, now, Tracie - show us where the food goes! Okay, now, Tracie - show us where the food goes! DMCA
“Or I’ll smash ya right in the mush!” “Or I’ll smash ya right in the mush!” DMCA
“I’m really tired of waiting around.  Are we gonna climb every... “I’m really tired of waiting around.  Are we gonna climb every... DMCA
Sometimes life gives you signs and incentives in unexpected... Sometimes life gives you signs and incentives in unexpected... DMCA
“No, there’s nothing there.  And I’m really looking!” “No, there’s nothing there.  And I’m really looking!” DMCA
“Say! Who’s your friend in the clown shoes and tutu?” “Say! Who’s your friend in the clown shoes and tutu?” DMCA
Christmas at the Tonsillectomy club. Christmas at the Tonsillectomy club. DMCA
Promptly broke out in Ben-Day dots. Promptly broke out in Ben-Day dots. DMCA
“Oh, god, it’s not another foot massager is it?” “Oh, god, it’s not another foot massager is it?” DMCA
“Yes, I have heard the good news about Armageddon, now please... “Yes, I have heard the good news about Armageddon, now please... DMCA
The British Sandwich: What is it really? The British Sandwich: What is it really? DMCA
Drink Coke. Defy gravity. Drink Coke. Defy gravity. DMCA
Leslie Howard: He knows what you do when the lights  go out. Leslie Howard: He knows what you do when the lights  go out. DMCA
It was true.  Of all the special frogs in western Louisiana,... It was true.  Of all the special frogs in western Louisiana,... DMCA
“The fact that I was a lifelong junkie had absolutely nothing to... “The fact that I was a lifelong junkie had absolutely nothing to... DMCA
And the painting of Kiss (minus Gene Simmons) just appeared one... And the painting of Kiss (minus Gene Simmons) just appeared one... DMCA
“No, mother, he’s still here.  Well, he says he won’t leave... “No, mother, he’s still here.  Well, he says he won’t leave... DMCA
A germ’s eye view of your last dentist visit. A germ’s eye view of your last dentist visit. DMCA
“I’m telling you, Claire, it just doesn’t sound as  good without... “I’m telling you, Claire, it just doesn’t sound as  good without... DMCA
The sad, desperate life of Walter Nightscope. The sad, desperate life of Walter Nightscope. DMCA
The wealth of a nation is often indicated by the quality of its... The wealth of a nation is often indicated by the quality of its... DMCA
“I  can absolutely fit inside this record player if I relax my... “I  can absolutely fit inside this record player if I relax my... DMCA
“Ah! Prisoner 12857! Have you found Jesus yet? No? Well, just... “Ah! Prisoner 12857! Have you found Jesus yet? No? Well, just... DMCA
“No, I’m something worse.  I sell solar panels door-to-door.” “No, I’m something worse.  I sell solar panels door-to-door.” DMCA
“I knew I’d have to check for my wallet sooner or later.” “I knew I’d have to check for my wallet sooner or later.” DMCA
“No!  I wrote that poem about you!  You keep it.” “No!  I wrote that poem about you!  You keep it.” DMCA
Naomi will now teach us all how to get ahead. Naomi will now teach us all how to get ahead. DMCA
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