Texts from Starkiller

Texts from Starkiller

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A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, some great drunk-texting took place
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(865): You are my mentor.(276): I drank wine out of a protein... (865): You are my mentor.(276): I drank wine out of a protein... DMCA
(218): I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the... (218): I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the... DMCA
(309): you’re usually drunk when you offer. there’s... (309): you’re usually drunk when you offer. there’s... DMCA
(214): I feel like our relationship should have moved on from... (214): I feel like our relationship should have moved on from... DMCA
(913): I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not... (913): I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not... DMCA
(410): no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can... (410): no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can... DMCA
(708): I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY’RE... (708): I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY’RE... DMCA
(708): I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY’RE... (708): I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY’RE... DMCA
(330): Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail. (330): Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail. DMCA
(513): I just threw up 34 cents. What in god’s name did we... (513): I just threw up 34 cents. What in god’s name did we... DMCA
(215): I need to be more functional. That doesn’t mean... (215): I need to be more functional. That doesn’t mean... DMCA
(708): worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a... (708): worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a... DMCA
(708): worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a... (708): worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a... DMCA
(334): Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess... (334): Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess... DMCA
(330): Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex... (330): Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex... DMCA
(509): I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever... (509): I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever... DMCA
(205): my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie.... (205): my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie.... DMCA
(901): All the doctor said was why (901): All the doctor said was why DMCA
(630): I’m going to smell of sex and shame.(1-630): How is... (630): I’m going to smell of sex and shame.(1-630): How is... DMCA
(630): I’m going to smell of sex and shame.(1-630): How is... (630): I’m going to smell of sex and shame.(1-630): How is... DMCA
(61): he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a... (61): he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a... DMCA
(859): I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because... (859): I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because... DMCA
(714): i’m not so sure everythign we did last night was... (714): i’m not so sure everythign we did last night was... DMCA
(412): omg his dad is hot(410): … I’m currently... (412): omg his dad is hot(410): … I’m currently... DMCA
(412): omg his dad is hot(410): … I’m currently... (412): omg his dad is hot(410): … I’m currently... DMCA
(201): Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday (201): Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday DMCA
(860): Well its official, I’m into significantly freakier... (860): Well its official, I’m into significantly freakier... DMCA
(231): I’ll do whatever I want when I’m 80.(989): If... (231): I’ll do whatever I want when I’m 80.(989): If... DMCA
(231): I’ll do whatever I want when I’m 80.(989): If... (231): I’ll do whatever I want when I’m 80.(989): If... DMCA
(386): I want to preface this by saying nothing happened,... (386): I want to preface this by saying nothing happened,... DMCA
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